I baked this week. I made 2 giant wheels of shortbread, sandwiched them together with some semi melted marshmallow and raspberry jam and covered the whole thing in chocolate. Yep, I made a giant wagon wheel. It is 23cm across, and is chilling in the fridge.
What’s the relevance of that, you may ask? After all, people bake all the time, and people who know me know that I bake. And besides, someone else came up with the idea of a wagon wheel…
The point is, it’s been over a fortnight since I last baked something. And I can’t remember the last time I properly spent time with the people I love (outside of my own household). And by properly, I mean able to hug them and enjoy their company without feeling like I’m breaking lockdown rules (for the record, I haven’t to the best of my knowledge broken lockdown rules. But the guidelines keep changing and I get confused!)
I was fortunate enough to be able to spend sometime in January with a friend exploring future vision. And part of that meant discovering what makes me tick, what gives me life. I don’t mean oxygen (although that certainly does keep me alive!) but I mean what activities do I do that make the difference between surviving and getting through, and actually enjoying life.
Yep, baking and spending time with the people I love were high on the list. As was writing (I know, interesting choice. But hey, that’s the way God made me so I’m not gonna quibble it!) But I’ve been lacking motivation to write, and while Zoom and phone calls are great, they just aren’t a substitute for actually meeting people face to face and talking to them and watching Picard with them and playing monopoly… (disclaimer: other tv shows and games are available) Even a weekly virtual pub quiz is a reminder of the physical distance that separates us right now.
Please don’t misunderstand, I know people have it much worse than me. And I know that social distancing is a wise measure to keep us safe. So I don’t mean to sound like I’m moaning. I only say this because at the same time as exploring these things in January, my friend also said it’s worth knowing what gives me life so that when I notice that I’m getting irritable, or behaving out of character, or feeling overwhelmed and weary, I may be able to track down why. What is lacking? Is something impacting on my values? Or are my passions being stifled? Or is it something else?
Knowing my values, knowing what motivates me and knowing what passions I have meant that when I noticed how tired and irritable I had become in the last week I was able to do something about it. And this is something I wanted to share with you too. After all, John 10:10 says I came that you may have life, and have it to the full. We aren’t supposed to walk through life from one bill to another hoping we’ll get enough in our pay packet to cover it. We’re not supposed to struggle alone, or spend all of our time doing things out of a sense of duty. There is joy for us, and happiness and love. In between paying bills/rent/mortgage/groceries we are allowed to have fun.
If we aren’t getting enough food, our body tells us. If we are lacking water, our body will let us know. If we need more iron or vitamin C, there are symptoms (some are more obvious than others) And once we have identified the symptoms we (or someone who is medically trained) can help us to change something and make up for the deficit. Our souls are no different. When we are behaving out of character, or we are listless and lacking motivation, it may be that we are missing something in our lives. However, each of us was made differently. I need to be creative, and I enjoy baking and writing (and drawing ducks, but I can only draw so many ducks). I also value relationships with friends and family. Captain Obvious strikes again: you aren’t me. You might need to explore nature, or play sport, or something else entirely. So here are a few questions for you to ponder:
- What are the most important things in your life and work? What can you not live without?
- What are your personal values?
- What are some of the passions carried forward from childhood you could still spend hours and hours doing today?
Using the answers above, are there any themes? Do you enjoy problem solving perhaps, or being creative? Or maybe there’s an adventurous streak in you. Whatever there may be, there is no right or wrong answer. But if, like me, you reach a point where you are lacking energy and are acting out of character, go back to the list ask yourself when was the last time you did something just for fun? Is there something on the list you could do now?
In my walk with God over the past few years, I have discovered more about myself than I dare to admit, both in areas of strength and areas for growth. But the funny thing is that wherever something was lacking God provided a way for me to grow in it. For me, that came in the form of friends who are like family, people to bake for and encouragement and an output to write. (It also took the form of some tough love, some very patient and loving people refusing to give up on me and experiences I’d never have dreamed of on my own). The point is, God wants what is best for you. He wants you to grow to be the best person you can be.
A bold claim considering I have only quoted the bible once in this post (so far). That because the bible is divinely inspired, it is God’s word. But God is a Living God and wants to experience life with you. So, go and seek God, go and find some joy. Jesus came that you might have life to the fullest.
One final bible verse to finish off:
Zephaniah 3:17
The Lord your God is with you,
the Mighty Warrior who saves.
He will take great delight in you;
in his love he will no longer rebuke you,
but will rejoice over you with singing
The Reason for my Hope Blog 