It’s ok to change your mind (part 3)

There are some things in our lives that we are adamant that we hold the right opinion on. For whatever reason, maybe past experiences, maybe a prevailing culture where we live, maybe our way of viewing things, we know that we are right about something or someone. The things that usually fall into this category are more often than not the things that cause the most division within countries/communities/work places/households (you get the idea). They often seem to be things that cause us to become defensive and angry, or cause strong debates that some people can do well while others handle less eloquently.

The things is, these are also probably the things that are less black and white than we would like to think. And changing our minds on these topics can take a lot. And guess what? I can think of a prime example in the bible (of course…)

Think about Jonah. He travels around passing onto the people in the towns and cities he visits the messages God gives him. He hears directly and personally from God. He knows a little of God’s character. And so, when he hears that God wants him to go to Ninevah he says… no. He says no because the people of Ninevah don’t follow the rules of God, they have different gods? He says no because he is scared of what the people of Ninevah will do to him? He says no because… he knows that God is merciful and he doesn’t want the people of Ninevah to be saved.

It is his own opinion, his own prejudices that send him running and sailing in the opposite direction. But God doesn’t let him get away with that, instead sending a storm and a fish to nudge Jonah onto the right path. So eventually Jonah goes to Ninevah and passes on the message that God would overthrow them. And the people of Ninevah listened to this strange man and cried out to God and turned away from their evil ways. Jonah had predicted this might happen, and as predicted, God saw that they had changed and didn’t destroy them.

But Jonah wasn’t convinced and got angry at God for saving these people. God tries to teach him about caring about things that weren’t his using a tree. He caused a tree to grow which provided shade for Jonah, and Jonah was pleased with the plant. The next day God caused the plant to wither. He explains that Jonah is angry about the loss of the plant even though the plant didn’t belong to him, just like God didn’t want to lose Ninevah even though the Ninevites weren’t God’s chosen people. (Old Testament: God’s people are the tribes of Israel) They were still part of creation and God still loved them and wanted to save them.

We never find out if Jonah actually changed his mind about the Ninevites, but there is an opportunity here for us to learn too. Maybe we don’t feel we can change strongly held beliefs straight away, but what is the cost of holding those beliefs so strongly that we argue with the people who live around us, or post hurtful and hateful things on the internet? Are we so stuck in our beliefs that we would rather run in the opposite direction than look at ourselves and see where we are blinded by traditions? Have we been so hurt by our past that it’s easier to stick to the same view than to acknowledge our scars?

Sometimes, like Jonah, we might find ourselves in a position where we can either become bitter and angry, or we can be open to changing our minds. And that brings me onto the reason I hold onto hope in the future. Jonah, who had heard from God personally, who had been swallowed by a fish and sent where he didn’t want to go, said this about the character of God: You are a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger and abounding in love (Jonah 4: 2)

It seems to me that it is never too late to change your mind about anything. And if you believe in God who forgives and is compassionate, then maybe that will make it easier to keep an open mind that is ready to learn new things or hear about different opinions. Not because you have to change your mind.

But because if you decide you want to change your mind, that’s ok.

It’s ok to change your mind (part 2)

Last post, I wrote about the best piece of advice I’d ever received. And it genuinely is. I know of people who have said they want to become a doctor, and then felt pressured to follow that path even though their heart wasn’t in it. I know people who have a political opinion that makes them unwilling to listen to other points of view because it might make them look weak if they realise they agree with the opposite view point. (Please don’t take that as a political dig, everyone has reasons for their opinions and my intention is not to judge or tell you what your opinion should be!) I know people who have formed an opinion about someone and that has never changed, despite the person in question changing as they have grown up or progressed through life.

It’s this final example I wanted to highlight today. My second biblical example of a person who changes their mind is Saul/Paul. A man of influence who persecuted people who believed in and followed Jesus after he had died and risen, he stood by and watched as Stephen was martyred in Jerusalem. He scattered the early Church, driving them out of Jerusalem, and then travelled the surrounding area to throw more followers of Jesus in jail or have them killed.

On one hand, Saul believes he is doing what is right, to protect the purity of the Jewish faith and to follow the rules and laws handed down since Abraham. Maybe he is trying to protect the innocent people from what many considered to be a dangerous cult. On the other hand, he does it with great zeal and passion. Maybe he enjoys the power and influence he has a bit too much. Either way, Jesus has other plans.

On the way to Damascus to sentence more followers of Jesus to death, Saul is met bby a blinding light and a loud voice. The voice, heard only by Saul (his travel party heard thunder, but not words) asks, “Why are you persecuting me?” Saul asks who is speaking and the voice says, “I am Jesus, who you are persecuting. Go into Damascus and I will tell you what to do.”

Now Saul is left blind and has to be led into Damascus, and he doesn’t eat or drink for three days. A follower of Jesus named Ananias comes to Saul and prays for him to be filled with the Holy Spirit. Scales fall from Saul’s eyes and he can see again.

The thing is that Saul has a reputation. He has power and influence within the Jewish faith, and he has become known as someone who hates Jesus and Jesus’ followers. After this, he changes his mind completely. Instead of staying on the same path, instead of fading slowly into the background or gradually changing his actions, he completely changes immediately. He starts to preach in the synagogues that Jesus is the Son of God. He became one of the most influential mouthpieces for the early church, spreading the message through the surrounding cities and across countries.

Saul changed his mind about Jesus because of an encounter with him. He learns something new and doesn’t let his reputation or previous opinions get in the way of changing direction and starting something new. Are we ever stuck in a way of thinking because we are scared to change our minds, scared of what others will think or feel pressured by expectations of the world to think or act a certain way? Admittedly, we won’t all have a Road to Damascus experience to help us change our minds, but do we ever miss subtle encounters that might show us that we were wrong about someone or something, or that someone or something has changed?

Changing your mind about anything requires courage, and sometimes it requires time and patience and that’s ok too. But you never have to feel trapped because of what you have said, thought or done. It is always ok to change your mind.

It’s ok to change your mind

I wonder what the best piece of advice you’ve ever received is. For me, without a doubt, it was a college tutor telling the tutor group that it’s always ok to change your mind. You can think one thing today and then learn something new, or experience something which impacts you, or meet someone who changes the way you view things. And that’s alright. Just because one day you said your favourite food was bacon doesn’t mean that your favourite food has to be bacon for the rest of your life!

Ok, that’s a flippant example, but the same thing applies for careers, politics, opinions, beliefs… In fact, there are very few decisions that are set in stone. I did a degree in music, volunteered for a church and now work in tourism. My favourite fruit used to be watermelon, now I prefer blackberries. Over time, I have also changed my mind on more political topics.

The point is, no matter what decisions we make we are rarely truly stuck. There is always hope. If you don’t like where you are going, you can change your mind. Sometimes opinions or decisions are right for one season, but not for the next. (By season, I mean christian-ese for a period in our life often defined by a trend in emotions or a pattern of occurrences. Often used ‘seasons’ include season of waiting, season of growing, season of letting go.) Seasons are a helpful analogy though, because just like the seasons in the year, they change. Maybe the changes are subtle, maybe they are huge. Maybe the change is gradual or maybe it’s sudden. But seasons change, and with them we can change our minds.

Better yet, their is a biblical precedent for it. Over the next three posts I’m going to visit three bible characters that prove to me that it’s ok to change your mind.

The first character is Peter. The impulsive disciple. Started out as a fisherman. That’s what he was trained as, that was his career. Then some radical guy from Nazareth came along and said “Follow me and I’ll make you a fisher of men”. And so Peter changed his mind. He wouldn’t follow the family business that he had trained for. He would follow this new opportunity that had come up. I bet when he was learning how to fish he never imagined the opportunity would come to leave the nets behind and travel with a guy who would heal and drive out demons, or that he would become a spokesman for the early church! But the point is he didn’t remain stuck in a job, he didn’t take the safe route. He changed his mind.

Not sold? Ok, how about at the last supper. Jesus kneels to wash his feet. Peter is shocked (slaves washed feet, not respected teachers). He refuses. Jesus says “if you won’t let me wash your feet, you have no place with me”. Peter changes his mind. “Ok, then wash all of me!” Oh, Peter! Quite an extreme change of mind. But Jesus replies “If you’ve had a bath you are already clean, only your feet need washing” (Ok, there’s a spiritual level to the exchange too, and I have paraphrased, but you get the idea.) And Peter changes his mind and submits. Always open to correction, Peter knows he can change his mind around Jesus and Jesus will accept it.

Let’s go for one more example. Jesus has died, risen and ascended. Peter is know sharing the news among the Jews. Then he gets a dream. In the dream, there is a large sheet lowered from heaven covered in animals that were considered unclean and not edible in Jewish culture. A voice urges Peter to kill and eat from the sheet. In the vision, Peter refuses, saying he has never eaten anything impure or unclean. The voice then says “Do not call anything impure that God has made clean”. The sheet returns to heaven and Peter is sent to preach to the Gentiles, because God had taught him not to call anything impure which God had made clean, and the God had spoken to these men too even though they weren’t Jews. And Peter doesn’t say “I’m sorry, I’ve only ever teach Jews.” Instead he says “God has just taught me not to call impure what he has made clean” and started to teach them about Jesus. And those men were annointed and believed in Jesus. Again, Peter changes his mind, this time based on learning something new.

So you see, changing your mind on opinions is biblical. Saying something then changing your mind is biblical. Deciding to change career and try something new is biblical. We are never stuck by where our past has put us. There is always hope for the future. And the best bit is we never know what’s round the corner! Sometimes, we just have to know it’s ok to change your mind.

Being Boromir

It’s been a few weeks. A lot has happened. The country has started moving again. Who knows what comes next? For this post I’m going to move away from the bible. But there is still a message of hope!

If you haven’t seen The Lord of the Rings: The Extended Edition, fair warning: SPOILER ALERT!

I have a brain that loves pictures and imagination. I can watch a film or read a book and find something in it I can use to talk about God and us. And LOTR has so much wisdom to it among the many battles that it’s a little treasure trove.

I grew up with LOTR. That and Star Wars always seemed to be on the TV (and Jurassic Park, but not as big a fan of that one).

I’ve been wanting to rewatch the films for ages but haven’t been able to justify the time. Now, however…

They are epic films on so many levels. The music, the scenery, the adventure, the quotes, the characters. I think the only thing I can fault in the films is American actors occasionally letting their English accent slip, and as accents are not one of my gifts it doesn’t bother me too much. (Note here, I haven’t actually read the books all the way through. I usually get stuck at the council meeting).

I could talk for hours about the number of quotes in these films. There are quotes to give hope, quotes to inspire and plenty of quotes to add humour to your day. (There’s a great one about potatoes…)

But I wanted to focus instead on the characters. There are such a range of characters in the films. Each has strengths and weaknesses, and each goes on their own adventure which isn’t necessarily the main one in the plot. It’s a bit like life if you think about it. Each of us has our own part to play in the narrative, even if it’s not the one we thought when we started out, and sometimes it’s not until we look back that we can see how important it was.

More than that, because of the range of characters in the plot, you may find you can identify with one of the characters. Or maybe you know people in real life who are very similar to the characters in the story. I am undoubtedly Pippin: naïve yet brave, good intentioned but also impulsive. And I’m quite short…

Saying that, I was struck by Boromir this time. I’ve always had a soft spot for Boromir. Maybe it has something to do with him being played by Sean Bean who I believe is one of the best actors around. But I grew up thinking Boromir wasn’t someone to aspire to be like. (Here come the spoilers)

Boromir is angry and disrespectful in the council meeting (we must all have experienced someone who knows best in our staff meetings!) He is constantly tempted by the ring and near the end even attacks the hero (Frodo) to try and take the ring from him. He is also the only one of the fellowship not given a gift in Lothlorien and who doesn’t survive the quest.

However, at a closer look there are certain qualities that we could aspire to. He is driven, in part, by a deep compassion for his people. He wants to use the ring as a weapon in order to save the lives of the people of Gondor. When he is outvoted, he joins the fellowship and fights bravely every time he is called upon. During the journey, he is the one who takes the time to teach Merry and Pippin to fight (well, tries to!) After the journey through the mines he is the one calling on the others to give the hobbits time to grieve for their friend. Time and again, you see compassion in these little moments.

Yes, he seems to continually talk about taking a detour via Gondor, but we also later learn that he has a very pushy father. Can anyone relate to that?

And yes, he does give in to temptation and attempt to take the ring by force. But we see almost immediate remorse when he realises what he has done. And he doesn’t give up. He could have run away in shame. Instead he stays and fights against overwhelming odds, singlehandedly fighting to protect the two members of the fellowship who are probably worth the least and are (logically at least) the most expendable. He makes some bad choices, but he is honourable and kind. And his determination to protect these two hobbits who are so far from home leads him to one of the most heroic death scenes out there (in my opinion).

But more than that. He is dying, and the first thing he tells Aragorn is that they ‘took the little ones’. Still trying to save people. And then he asks after Frodo and admits what he has done. He doesn’t hide it as a secret and take it to the grave, he brings it into the light.

Next to Aragorn, it is easy to view Boromir as lesser. Aragorn is humble, gentle and wise. But he is not perfect either. I think there is a lot we can learn from Boromir:

  • Making a mistake doesn’t stop us from being a hero in our own and/or someone else’s story.
  • No one is too small or unimportant to be worth fighting for and saving
  • And when we do make a mistake, when we do give in to temptation, the best thing to do is to bring it into the light. Find someone we trust and tell them. Boromir dies in peace in the end, because he has nothing to hide and because Aragorn listens and doesn’t judge. Is there something today that is causing you to feel ashamed? Be wise in who you tell, but bring it into the light. Share it with God and with someone you trust and respect.

Life… finds a way

Any Jurassic Park fans out there? This quote, from the very first film way back in 1993, shows Dr Malcolm’s cynicism at the scientists being able to control the dinosaur population. It is his suggestion that, despite all the measures they have put in place life isn’t meant to be contained and controlled in such a way. Life will find a way to freedom.

Jump back to the Old Testament and the story of Daniel. Whilst in exile, Daniel is faithful to God. The law of the land said that he couldn’t pray or worship God, but he remained to true to what he believed. Rules were imposed and the Jewish faith should have faded away. But God finds a way. Through Daniel and other individuals remaining faithful, through miracles, despite the constraints, God finds a way.

Jump forward to Acts, where Christians are being persecuted. But people like Peter remained faithful and continued to preach about Jesus. Jesus himself meets Saul on the road and transforms him into one of the key figures credited with spreading the gospel in Europe. Christianity should have been killed off, worshiping gods, although allowed, was only allowed if one of those gods was the Roman Emperor. But because of the faithfulness of those who believed, the church thrived in persecution and many were healed and blessed, and came to believe in God.

Jump to today. Over the last few years I have been in a small church based in an estate that is not hugely rich. As numbers worshiping with us on a Sunday have aged and dwindled, we have been hugely blessed by faithful volunteers coming alongside us to reach out to our local community. A humble little church doing all it can with faithful friends acting out of love to meet the needs we can in our local community. For the last 4 years, we have even managed to run a holiday club to bless the local children with fun, games, crafts and tell them about our faith. Each year it has grown a little, and we have become a little more ambitious. And each year, despite some trials, God has faithfully sent enough volunteers to make it happen, and children and families for us to bless.

This year, we planned early so it would be amazing, building on the success of last year. And then, in the UK in March 2020, lock-down hit. We kept planning just in case restrictions were eased and we could run, but come July and the team involved decided we wouldn’t be able to run a physical holiday club. But we didn’t give up.

We just happened to have on the team a couple of people with expertise in filming and video editing. And we just happened to have some enthusiastic people willing to give up their time. And so, we decided to take our message online. But more than that, we decided we could also provide something physical for families in the form of craft packs each day. So we adapted, remaining faithful to what we believed God wanted us to do for the area.

And then it grew. And it wasn’t just one small area we were able to offer the craft packs to, it was 4 whole post codes. And it wasn’t just a handful of families, but 100 children. And more than that, the online content could (and has been) shared beyond that. At the time of writing, I am told that there are people signed up to access the online content on 3 continents.

I say this not to show off, but because I am feeling hugely humbled. This team is fantastic and have come behind a vision to love and bless people first, and to share our faith with them as we do that. But, lets face it, this shouldn’t work. Our team just happened to have the enough people in the right place, and we just happened to find the funds to make this possible, and we just happened to been given access to somewhere we could do filming, and we just happened to be able to fit a filming schedule in around what the team was doing, and we just happened to have the time to organise and put this together in about a month, and we just happened to be able to get the equipment for the craft packs delivered in time to be made up… The list goes on. It could be a series of coincidences. It could be a run of good fortune.

But then you put it in the context I outlined first, how in difficult circumstances God finds a way to continue to share how much He loves people, how God uses faithful people to spread His blessing. And this team I am part of are not the only ones. I hear stories of others finding new ways to share the message, and more people people being reached than they ever expected. And that’s why I hold onto my hope in God. Because when the way ahead looks blocked, God does more than I could ever have expected. God’s love cannot be contained. It does not belong in a building, but freely flows to the people He created. It cannot be constrained by rules, but finds its own way grow.

God… finds a way.

Don’t count sheep!

Have you ever seen White Christmas? I was fortunate enough to see it on the West End with Aled Jones and Tom Chambers, and thoroughly enjoyed it. Fantastic talent and a brilliant story-line. But there was one song that stuck with me long after I left the theatre (and no, I don’t mean White Christmas!)

I don’t want to spoil the story for anyone who hasn’t seen it, so I’ll try and be a little vague. There is a young girl in the play who in one particular scene can’t sleep because she is worried about a lot of things. The main character sings her a lullabye called Count your blessings (instead of sheep). The idea behind it is so simple and so profound, I used it as a basis for a new prayer habit.

As I read the news, scroll through social media or listen to the people around me, there is an awful lot of uncertainty about what is coming next. Some people are concerned about job security and money, some have fears about health. For some, the idea of having to leave the house is proving a cause for worry after months of staying inside. Whatever your situation is, whatever is causing you worry and concern, I don’t want to diminish that. But I have found that with in each day there are also things to be thankful for. There are positive things that can bring light with them. Sometimes it’s a message from a friend, or a smile from a stranger. Sometimes it’s reading a much-loved book or watching a favourite film. Birds, flowers, the moon – all things I have been thankful for at various times. Sometimes it’s as basic as drinking a cup of tea at the perfect temperature.

The lyrics of the song say ‘When I’m worried and I can’t sleep, I count my blessings instead of sheep. And I fall asleep counting my blessings’. It can be easy to feel overwhelmed by the uncertainty. Sometimes the darkness and despair threatens to block out all hope. My message here is one of personal experience. If I can make a list of 10 points of light each day before you go to sleep, I find my mind is calmer and I can sleep a little easier. For me, this takes the form of thinking of 10 things I can thank God for. Sometimes they are big things like a new job or an unexpected windfall, but more often than not they are more everyday things like friends and family, or little pleasures like Milka chocolate.

So if you are worried, and you are having trouble sleeping, see if you can find the light in your day to be thankful for. I promise you it will be there. There is always light somewhere. There is always hope.

When disappointment hits

Have you ever worked hard towards an outcome, piled in time and energy in the hope that progress could be made, and allowed yourself to hope that the situation has improved? And then has something happened that has brought it all crashing down and left you feeling angry or disappointed and just wanting to throw in the towel and give up? If not, you are a stronger person than I am. If this rings a bell with you, you may be able to appreciate sort of how I felt within the last week.

Alongside my day-jobs I have dedicated a large portion of my time, energy and prayer to working towards reconciliation in a particular setting. This week I was in a virtual meeting where what I experienced showed me that the progress I thought had been made was not firm. And it left me feeling very angry and disappointed, and lacking the energy to keep trying. I was angry at the people directly involved, I was angry at the people who had been watching from the side-lines along the way and choosing to remain distant, I was even angry at God who promises to answer our prayers. I wasn’t seeing evidence of that!

Sometimes the battles that we face that affect us deeply are huge, global issues. Sometimes they are small local issues, personal to a few. The one I’ve been talking about probably doesn’t have global repercussions. But it’s still something I have invested myself into. If somethings never change and somethings do nothing but change, how can we know where to trust or what to hope in?

Then I found a little tidbit of theological wisdom in a very random place. I watched Frozen 2. I won’t spoil the film for anyone who hasn’t seen it. I have to admit I was pleasantly surprised by the film and thought it was better than the first one. But from the start there is a slightly comic character development where Olaf is ‘maturing’ and considering what change means. And then there comes this wise line: I’ve just thought of one thing that’s permanent… Love!

If you are a bible scholar, you can track the love that God shows for his people throughout the bible. Abraham and his descendants were blessed in order to bless others. Jesus came and showed love to the people he met more than judgement. The book of Acts opens up the family of God to all peoples and races, not just Jews.

Throughout history, the Church has not always acted in love. Not all Christians have rooted their actions to show God’s love. But God’s love itself has not gone away. It has remained constant. My first known encounter with God was an outpouring of a Father’s love while I was alone and desperate and searching. It was like nothing I had ever felt before, like a flame had been lit in my heart and with it a sense of peace and belonging.

It’s easy to get sucked into the worries of everyday life. It is right to stand up against injustice where we see it. It’s even ok to get angry and disappointed. But through all of that, God’s love remains constant. For me, being reminded of that very first encounter also reminds me of why I continue to put my trust in God, and why I continue to have hope.

Yes, the disappointment hurts. No, I can’t explain why the situation didn’t go the way I thought it should. Sometimes all we can do is trust in God’s long-term plan. We are very used to seeing the immediate problems and not as good at being patient. Not many things we see are permanent. Some things change quickly, somethings change extremely slowly. Some things we would like to see change, somethings we would rather remained the same.

But there is this one things you can rely on, one thing that remains constant, one thing you can choose to build your life and your actions on: God loves his children. Including me.

Including you.

Living life

I baked this week. I made 2 giant wheels of shortbread, sandwiched them together with some semi melted marshmallow and raspberry jam and covered the whole thing in chocolate. Yep, I made a giant wagon wheel. It is 23cm across, and is chilling in the fridge.

What’s the relevance of that, you may ask? After all, people bake all the time, and people who know me know that I bake. And besides, someone else came up with the idea of a wagon wheel…

The point is, it’s been over a fortnight since I last baked something. And I can’t remember the last time I properly spent time with the people I love (outside of my own household). And by properly, I mean able to hug them and enjoy their company without feeling like I’m breaking lockdown rules (for the record, I haven’t to the best of my knowledge broken lockdown rules. But the guidelines keep changing and I get confused!)

I was fortunate enough to be able to spend sometime in January with a friend exploring future vision. And part of that meant discovering what makes me tick, what gives me life. I don’t mean oxygen (although that certainly does keep me alive!) but I mean what activities do I do that make the difference between surviving and getting through, and actually enjoying life.

Yep, baking and spending time with the people I love were high on the list. As was writing (I know, interesting choice. But hey, that’s the way God made me so I’m not gonna quibble it!) But I’ve been lacking motivation to write, and while Zoom and phone calls are great, they just aren’t a substitute for actually meeting people face to face and talking to them and watching Picard with them and playing monopoly… (disclaimer: other tv shows and games are available) Even a weekly virtual pub quiz is a reminder of the physical distance that separates us right now.

Please don’t misunderstand, I know people have it much worse than me. And I know that social distancing is a wise measure to keep us safe. So I don’t mean to sound like I’m moaning. I only say this because at the same time as exploring these things in January, my friend also said it’s worth knowing what gives me life so that when I notice that I’m getting irritable, or behaving out of character, or feeling overwhelmed and weary, I may be able to track down why. What is lacking? Is something impacting on my values? Or are my passions being stifled? Or is it something else?

Knowing my values, knowing what motivates me and knowing what passions I have meant that when I noticed how tired and irritable I had become in the last week I was able to do something about it. And this is something I wanted to share with you too. After all, John 10:10 says I came that you may have life, and have it to the full. We aren’t supposed to walk through life from one bill to another hoping we’ll get enough in our pay packet to cover it. We’re not supposed to struggle alone, or spend all of our time doing things out of a sense of duty. There is joy for us, and happiness and love. In between paying bills/rent/mortgage/groceries we are allowed to have fun.

If we aren’t getting enough food, our body tells us. If we are lacking water, our body will let us know. If we need more iron or vitamin C, there are symptoms (some are more obvious than others) And once we have identified the symptoms we (or someone who is medically trained) can help us to change something and make up for the deficit. Our souls are no different. When we are behaving out of character, or we are listless and lacking motivation, it may be that we are missing something in our lives. However, each of us was made differently. I need to be creative, and I enjoy baking and writing (and drawing ducks, but I can only draw so many ducks). I also value relationships with friends and family. Captain Obvious strikes again: you aren’t me. You might need to explore nature, or play sport, or something else entirely. So here are a few questions for you to ponder:

  • What are the most important things in your life and work? What can you not live without?
  • What are your personal values?
  • What are some of the passions carried forward from childhood you could still spend hours and hours doing today?

Using the answers above, are there any themes? Do you enjoy problem solving perhaps, or being creative? Or maybe there’s an adventurous streak in you. Whatever there may be, there is no right or wrong answer. But if, like me, you reach a point where you are lacking energy and are acting out of character, go back to the list ask yourself when was the last time you did something just for fun? Is there something on the list you could do now?

In my walk with God over the past few years, I have discovered more about myself than I dare to admit, both in areas of strength and areas for growth. But the funny thing is that wherever something was lacking God provided a way for me to grow in it. For me, that came in the form of friends who are like family, people to bake for and encouragement and an output to write. (It also took the form of some tough love, some very patient and loving people refusing to give up on me and experiences I’d never have dreamed of on my own). The point is, God wants what is best for you. He wants you to grow to be the best person you can be.

A bold claim considering I have only quoted the bible once in this post (so far). That because the bible is divinely inspired, it is God’s word. But God is a Living God and wants to experience life with you. So, go and seek God, go and find some joy. Jesus came that you might have life to the fullest.

One final bible verse to finish off:

Zephaniah 3:17

The Lord your God is with you,

    the Mighty Warrior who saves.

He will take great delight in you;

    in his love he will no longer rebuke you,

    but will rejoice over you with singing

Many sparrows

This week, I was asked to write and record the sermon for the video my church puts out in place of a Sunday morning service at the moment. The set reading was Matthew 10: 24-39. Give it a read if you fancy. I found it a difficult passage to craft a sermon that both encourages and challenges. (I also found it a personal challenge to craft a sermon without really knowing who I was crafting it for, and then recording it to a camera without there being people in front of me to gauge the reaction). But I did find myself focusing on sparrows never being outside of the Father’s care, and how we are worth many sparrows. I don’t know about you, but I’ve never thought of my worth in sparrows before. It reminds me of Taskmaster where Alex Horne is comparing how well the contestants did to dogs or mice… It’s not a typical unit of measurement!

But if one sparrow is never outside of the Father’s care, and I am worth many sparrows (and so are you!) then, in simple mathematics, I am (and you are) also never outside of the Father’s care. Which then led me onto another example of Jesus’ care for people. If you read Mark 5 from verse 21 there is a story you may be familiar with. It’s the time the Jairus approaches Jesus because his daughter is dying. He falls at Jesus’ feet and begs Jesus to heal his daughter. And Jesus listens to him, and follows him to his home. Jesus always seems to attract a crowd, so they have to push through a lot of people to get to Jairus’ house. That day, there is someone else who is also desperate for Jesus’ help. A nameless woman has spent all she had on doctors who had failed to heal her. She had been subject to bleeding for 12 years. That would have been 12 years of being ritually unclean and being shunned. She would have got used to being invisible, and had a lot of practice at moving through a crowd unseen. She manages to reach Jesus and touch the hem of his cloak, and she is healed. But Jesus notices and stops while on his way to heal Jairus’ dying daughter. He singles out the woman and speaks to her.

While he is stopped, a messenger comes from Jairus’ house to tell them his daughter has died. Jesus overhears and says “Don’t be afraid, just believe.” He goes to the house, send everyone away except three disciples and the child’s parents, takes the girl by her hand and tells her to get up. The girl gets up and walks around.

There are so many layers to this story. You can use it to talk about the importance of our identity as children of God (which I may explore in a future post). You could use it to talk about not letting anything stop you getting to God.

But I would like to take a different angle. Jesus is on a mission to heal someone who is dying. It is a time critical mission. But on the way, a different situation presents itself. There is an immediate need right in front of Jesus. Instead of saying, “Please excuse me, I’m a little busy. You see someone is dying and I need to go. But I’ll come back once I’ve done that,” Jesus takes the time to see the woman. He doesn’t see what society sees, he doesn’t even see what the woman herself sees. He sees into her heart and he claims her as part of his family. No sparrow is outside of the Father’s care, and neither is this woman. There is an immediate need right and he responds.

But now look through Jairus’ eyes. Jesus has agreed to come and heal his daughter, but is instead stopping in the middle of a crowd to talk to a nameless beggar, all the while his daughter is getting worse! And then he hears the news he has been dreading – his daughter has died. But strangely Jesus isn’t bothered. Jairus is faced with a choice. Will he trust Jesus? He believed in Jesus enough to ask him to heal his daughter. How far will that trust go?

Jairus obviously chooses to trust Jesus further because he leads Jesus back to his house where Jesus does something else impossible. Jesus brings Jairus’ daughter back from the dead. No sparrow is outside of the Father’s care.

 In responding to one emergency, Jesus doesn’t choose the invisible member of society over the daughter of the important official. In what looks like a time critical situation, Jesus is able to respond to the needs of both daughters.

I wonder if there are some of us today who are feeling like the woman in this story, invisible and unheard. I wonder if that makes you hesitate to reach out and ask God for help because there is a bigger crisis and maybe society has told you that you are less important. You are not. You are worth many sparrows.

I wonder if there are some of us today that are tempted to be like Jairus in this story, maybe a little impatient because there is a time sensitive issue that needs to be rushed towards and handled. Maybe in your situation it feels like Jesus isn’t walking quickly enough or keeps getting distracted. But when bad news comes, will you still have the faith of Jairus? Or do you feel like you have wasted your time and that God has let you down. “Do not be afraid, just believe”. You, too are worth many sparrows.

So whether your situation is like Jairus and his daughter, or like the bleeding woman, keep hope because God can and does handle both. And if you start to despair and lose your hope and faith, just look for a sparrow* and remember. God cares a great deal for the sparrows, and you are worth many of them.

*If you are like me and not sure what a sparrow looks like, any bird will do

All things being equal…

It’s been a challenging week for me. Or maybe, it’s been a week of being challenged is more accurate. How can I be a real ally to the people around me? How can I bring hope and encouragement? How can I do more than just lip-service to a movement that is so important for the future like “Black Lives Matter”?

I saw a story going round on social media of an oboist at a conservatoire who had shared the struggles they had faced to get to where they are today, and the struggles they still go through. Things like not being treated equally in lessons, not getting the same opportunities, being targeted because of the colour of their skin. Oh, but also being wheeled out for ‘diversity’ photo shoots. It pulled me up short. I’ve done studies on gender and orchestras, but it never occurred to me to look at race and orchestras. And that’s the poison we face. We don’t acknowledge it. We don’t recognise it. We don’t see the part we play in it.

So what can we do? I believe humans were created with 2 great gifts; the ability to love and the ability to learn. And that’s where my seed of hope for this week comes in. The society that Jesus lived in is very different from the society we live in now. Slaves were considered normal, fighting to the death was a sport, and women had no (or very little) status. We now live in the 21st Century. Fighting to the death is illegal in most parts of the world. Slavery hasn’t been completely eradicated, but it is no longer considered normal and there are charities and laws working to protect people. And women can work, vote, own property and have some semblance of equality. None of it is perfect, there is more to be done in each of these areas. But through human’s standing up for change, change happens.

But there’s more. Because when I look at the way that Jesus acts, I see more reason to hope. Because Jesus sees people. He doesn’t ignore their race/gender/class. He sees exactly who they are. And he helps them anyway. The Samaritan woman at the well? Jesus sees her. The slave of the Roman centurion? Jesus heals him. The blind beggar? Jesus gives him his sight. The gospels were written for a reason: they are there to teach. (Romans 15: 4 ‘For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through endurance and encouragement of the scriptures we might have hope’) Jesus meets/eats with/heals/befriends a diverse bunch of people. And he encourages his followers to do the same.

They haven’t always got it right. But we have and I hope always will continue to learn, to grow and to strive to be better at following Jesus’ example. So if you’ve stumbled across this little blog on the internet and think I’ve got something wrong, I hope you can forgive me. Please, I want to learn so feel free to correct me. I want to love like Jesus loved – unconditionally. And it you’ve stumbled across this blog and are feeling like everyone is against you and you are being discriminated against, I believe there is a God who sees exactly who you are and loves you anyway. He is the God who created diversity, and we should celebrate it, not let it create divisions.

I’d like to leave you (if you’re still reading) with one more verse from the bible that I have found has helped me over the past couple of weeks: “There is neither Jew not Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male or female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus” (Galatians 3: 28)